Monday, May 24, 2010
A Return to Chill Civility
No...it's not ABOUT sex. I'm in Atlanta. Look up the ratio of women to purely heterosexual men. Then, factor in 6'4"…240#...employed...reasonably nice looking...intelligent. If it was just about ASS, chances are: I wouldn't be tryna holla @ YOU.
It's about companionship. But, I think I get it. I think I realize what I need to do.
This should be interesting.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch...
The catharsis of "closure" is, more often than not, a selfish need to vent at someone who did not take the course of action that YOU preferred. It is the adult equivalent to a temper tantrum...a hissy fit, if you will. The desired outcome of 'closure' is that the other party/parties know exactly why YOU are dissatisfied.
Meh! I just watched a 40-year-old woman throw a complete, fucking hissy fit in her lame attempt to get closure. It highlighted just how petty she actually is. Well, hopefully she got the emotional stabilization she so desperately needed out of that.
*smh*
This is one reason why I just STOP talking at a certain point. Communication has failed. The other person has already decided in her own mind what the state of reality currently is, normally based on her own mental state, without consulting mine and declared this is the way it is. I get annoyed because I see & know the things that she's failed to consider, but rather than ASK, she declares that 'this is how things are'. So…fine! That's how things are. I withdraw. Then, she gets upset because I didn't respond and argue with her about the shit. So, I put those things she ignored/didn't see in front of her and then she feels silly!
Monkeyshines…
Anyway, lemme do some more work.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
r e s o l v e
Know who's on my mind? 2Pac.
People don't realize that 2Pac on many of his more popular songs was actually a BLUES artist. I've dedicated "Do for Love" to myself for one very important reason: I'm a "sucka for Love". *smh@me* But, listen to the song.
That is the same blues that John Lee Hooker used to sing about. Life is a trap. I've let myself get caught up. I'm going to need to break out of this trap some kind of way. I've considered seriously returning to the ways of my youth.
Despite yourself, you give someone your heart. They hand it back with a sniff of disdain and walk away without ever once looking back. See the failure in that sequence? Giving somebody your heart is akin to a cow walking up to a butcher and bowing it's head before the ax. You have no one to blame but yourself.
F'real, though: the next chick that tells me that I'm not 'being fair' by comparing her to the way other people have treated me because she's DIFFERENT than them is gonna get laughed at and walked away from.
The blues...despair, rejection, survival. When he says, "My god!", that's more angst than a little bit. That's why his music hit folks at such a visceral level.
...and, I keep nodding and plugging away at this shitheap known colloquially as "life" until I don't have to. It's time for a change.
People don't realize that 2Pac on many of his more popular songs was actually a BLUES artist. I've dedicated "Do for Love" to myself for one very important reason: I'm a "sucka for Love". *smh@me* But, listen to the song.
That is the same blues that John Lee Hooker used to sing about. Life is a trap. I've let myself get caught up. I'm going to need to break out of this trap some kind of way. I've considered seriously returning to the ways of my youth.
Despite yourself, you give someone your heart. They hand it back with a sniff of disdain and walk away without ever once looking back. See the failure in that sequence? Giving somebody your heart is akin to a cow walking up to a butcher and bowing it's head before the ax. You have no one to blame but yourself.
F'real, though: the next chick that tells me that I'm not 'being fair' by comparing her to the way other people have treated me because she's DIFFERENT than them is gonna get laughed at and walked away from.
The blues...despair, rejection, survival. When he says, "My god!", that's more angst than a little bit. That's why his music hit folks at such a visceral level.
...and, I keep nodding and plugging away at this shitheap known colloquially as "life" until I don't have to. It's time for a change.
Friday, May 07, 2010
Irritable
Personal success does not mean that you're not a fucked up individual.
How many times have you seen a MAINSTREAM commercial that had five black guys and one white guy and it wasn't about a basketball team? But watch a beer commercial and they always include ONE black dude! So, if you have ONE black dude in your clique, then you must be doing ok, right? Consider, though, that you have never seen the ratio inverted in a commercial for something enjoyable. Folks will immediately roll their eyes and figure, "Oh, lord! Here we go! Another rant about racism! GET OVER IT!!! Your people are not slaves, now!" That reaction proves my point, though.
I was looking at MSNBC perforce, today. One of the plasma displays in the lobby is set to play that channel. I'm looking at how Black folks are represented in the mainstream media. It is all conditioning for the simpleminded and reinforces the stratification and status quo of our society. MSNBC is considered "liberal" media. If so, they're a worse offender even than FOX News. Fox is, at least, blatant about their bigotry. MSNBC discusses money and politics. The imagery they present is subtle. The authorities, sources and personalities they present on what is viewed as important are overwhelmingly White. The advertising for financial information is represented by an overwhelming White base of actors. Diversity is filled by a minority woman, killing two birds with one stone.
But, when something viewed as NEGATIVE is addressed, the imagery that you see is accompanied by Black Male faces.
'Jobless claims rose 2.43% last quarter. *Videos of Black men filling out paperwork in the unemployment office play*'
'The President's Healthcare Initiative hit another snag today! *A Black representative is interviewed who dutifully mentions marching with Martan Loofa Kang*'
...and, you dumb muthafukkaz fall for the okey doke, too.
You're being managed and conditioned by the things you're shown. And, you think this is the 'natural' order of things.
Original thought remains at a premium. Ugh!
Does this mean that minority people are some paragons of virtue and intellect? Hell, naw! What it means is: you need to start learning to think for yourself, you lemming! You might even want to consider NOT patronizing these media outlets who perpetuate these stereotypes.
To be fair, I can't speak a lick of Spanish that isn't profane, so I don't know how reputable Spanish news sources are. But, Black News is ass! Two bomb threats in a week in New York and the headlines on BlackPlanet are:
Hot News
They found a suspicious package in a cooler in front of a hotel in Times Square. Somebody's lunch is about to get detonated.
Oh...and the Times Square terrorist is about as much of a terrorist as The Shoe Bomber. Some weirdo goes looking for Al Qaeda training and Al Qaeda giggles behind its hand. "You want to blow up what? Ok, my friend, here's how you make a bomb! Yes, yes! 72 virgins! Remember connect the red wire here! A salaam alaikum! You know, we have this new underwear bomb! Go and show The Great Shaitan the power of Jihad!!!" Then, they send the idiot on his merry way. They've lost nothing but the time it takes to show that moron the basics.
That fool is in there singing like a canary, too...and ain't sayin' shit. They let him pee on himself once and made him sit in it. Now, he done gave them every bit of information he's learned since he was eight years old. *smh* Terrorist, my ass!
How many times have you seen a MAINSTREAM commercial that had five black guys and one white guy and it wasn't about a basketball team? But watch a beer commercial and they always include ONE black dude! So, if you have ONE black dude in your clique, then you must be doing ok, right? Consider, though, that you have never seen the ratio inverted in a commercial for something enjoyable. Folks will immediately roll their eyes and figure, "Oh, lord! Here we go! Another rant about racism! GET OVER IT!!! Your people are not slaves, now!" That reaction proves my point, though.
I was looking at MSNBC perforce, today. One of the plasma displays in the lobby is set to play that channel. I'm looking at how Black folks are represented in the mainstream media. It is all conditioning for the simpleminded and reinforces the stratification and status quo of our society. MSNBC is considered "liberal" media. If so, they're a worse offender even than FOX News. Fox is, at least, blatant about their bigotry. MSNBC discusses money and politics. The imagery they present is subtle. The authorities, sources and personalities they present on what is viewed as important are overwhelmingly White. The advertising for financial information is represented by an overwhelming White base of actors. Diversity is filled by a minority woman, killing two birds with one stone.
But, when something viewed as NEGATIVE is addressed, the imagery that you see is accompanied by Black Male faces.
'Jobless claims rose 2.43% last quarter. *Videos of Black men filling out paperwork in the unemployment office play*'
'The President's Healthcare Initiative hit another snag today! *A Black representative is interviewed who dutifully mentions marching with Martan Loofa Kang*'
...and, you dumb muthafukkaz fall for the okey doke, too.
You're being managed and conditioned by the things you're shown. And, you think this is the 'natural' order of things.
Original thought remains at a premium. Ugh!
Does this mean that minority people are some paragons of virtue and intellect? Hell, naw! What it means is: you need to start learning to think for yourself, you lemming! You might even want to consider NOT patronizing these media outlets who perpetuate these stereotypes.
To be fair, I can't speak a lick of Spanish that isn't profane, so I don't know how reputable Spanish news sources are. But, Black News is ass! Two bomb threats in a week in New York and the headlines on BlackPlanet are:
- Is Toyota Mocking Hip-Hop's "Swagger"?
- LisaRaye's 3 Tips For Single Mothers
- Caption This: What Is Rick Ross Trying To Say In This Photo?
- 5 Reasons J Lo Is Going From GIANT To Medium
Hot News
- Paper Depicts Obama As Character From "Sanford And Son"
- Police Shoot Man's Dogs In Marijuana Raid With Children Present
- Black Tea Partier Says "Uncle Tom Was A Hero"
- Jon Stewart Pokes Fun At Roland Martin's Ascot
- Man Says Woman Stabbed Him With Scissors Over Bad Sex
- School District Defends Blacks Only Field Trip
- P. Diddy's Sean John Gets Exclusive Deal With Macy's
- Europe Faces Pressure To Pay Slavery Reparations
- Swift Arrest Of Bombing Suspect A Rare Win For Embattled Holder
- Evidence Mounts For Taliban Involvement In Times Square Bombing
- President Of Nigeria Dies After Long Illness
- Higher Percentage Of Blacks Than Whites On Twitter
- Washington Times Times Says Term "Teabagger" Is Like N-Word
- Why Is The Jamaican Prime Minister Protecting A Reputed Criminal?
- Black Leaders Urge Indictments Of Police In Teen's Alleged Beating
- Sharpton And Phoenix Mayor To Lead March Against Immigration Law
They found a suspicious package in a cooler in front of a hotel in Times Square. Somebody's lunch is about to get detonated.
Oh...and the Times Square terrorist is about as much of a terrorist as The Shoe Bomber. Some weirdo goes looking for Al Qaeda training and Al Qaeda giggles behind its hand. "You want to blow up what? Ok, my friend, here's how you make a bomb! Yes, yes! 72 virgins! Remember connect the red wire here! A salaam alaikum! You know, we have this new underwear bomb! Go and show The Great Shaitan the power of Jihad!!!" Then, they send the idiot on his merry way. They've lost nothing but the time it takes to show that moron the basics.
That fool is in there singing like a canary, too...and ain't sayin' shit. They let him pee on himself once and made him sit in it. Now, he done gave them every bit of information he's learned since he was eight years old. *smh* Terrorist, my ass!
Thursday, May 06, 2010
Youuuuuuuuu!
So, I'm walking down the hall to get my coffee, minding my own business, when one of the executive admins pops through a door down the hall ahead of me. She's tall, slim and detached. Y'know...cool, but aloof. As she's walking, the battle computer that is my mind was momentarily agoggle, "What th-? Izzat? Is she wearing...Booty Pops?!?"
She went into her office and I went on to the kitchen to clean out my cup. So, as I was in the kitchen sub-audibly remembering something that I'd forgotten, who should walk through but the admin. She asked me who I was talking to. I said, "Myself." I was pouring cream into my cup when she walked past. Using scientific observation methods developed through years of practical research, I was able to determine that the modest bootymeat that I spied was indeed a natural blessing and not an enhancement. Well, all right!
I made the mistake of clicking a YouTube link that my son sent me. Now, I can't get the screamo version of Crank That (Soulja Boy) out of my head. I'm disturbed that I like that version better than the original.
"Youuuuuuuuuuu!"
As Mentioned Elsewhere
A chick is not qualified to wear shoes from Frederick's until she's been Supermanned at least once.
...and that exhausts all Soulja Boy references for a year...or until he does something ELSE stupid (like release another CD)...whichever comes first.
Sleeepy!
When I do finally fall asleep during the day, somebody or something invariably wakes me up. My consciousness is tattered right about now, though.
She went into her office and I went on to the kitchen to clean out my cup. So, as I was in the kitchen sub-audibly remembering something that I'd forgotten, who should walk through but the admin. She asked me who I was talking to. I said, "Myself." I was pouring cream into my cup when she walked past. Using scientific observation methods developed through years of practical research, I was able to determine that the modest bootymeat that I spied was indeed a natural blessing and not an enhancement. Well, all right!
I made the mistake of clicking a YouTube link that my son sent me. Now, I can't get the screamo version of Crank That (Soulja Boy) out of my head. I'm disturbed that I like that version better than the original.
"Youuuuuuuuuuu!"
As Mentioned Elsewhere
A chick is not qualified to wear shoes from Frederick's until she's been Supermanned at least once.
...and that exhausts all Soulja Boy references for a year...or until he does something ELSE stupid (like release another CD)...whichever comes first.
Sleeepy!
When I do finally fall asleep during the day, somebody or something invariably wakes me up. My consciousness is tattered right about now, though.
Wednesday, May 05, 2010
Where's Johny Sabatino?
Close your eyes and listen to this song ("Where's Johny Sabatino?"). You'll hear this...quiet desperation. He's not screaming...yet. But, his nerve is about to fail. He's at the end of his rope.
That's how I feel, right now.
There's a yawning chasm beneath me. Before I splatter all over when I hit bottom, there are lightning-fast monsters waiting to take chunks of my flesh. The rope that I'm holding onto is fraying and my strength is flagging. I'm trying. But, I can't get higher.
I gotta get out.
I can't stay here.
* * * * * * * * * *
And, people have a morbid fascination with a person at the end of their rope. They stand just out of reach and yell helpful shit like, "Hold on!" (or, "Jump!")
Fuckers.
The horror in this for me is that every time I think I see a ray of hope...a hand reaching from the darkness to steady me...I come to realize that the issue is my fluctuating perceptions. The problem is what I think I see rather than the actuality of the situation. The hand reaching out of the darkness is somebody flailing about blindly on their own rope. The hand recoils swiftly lest I dislodge its owner into the abyss below. The thought doesn't occur to the owner of that hand that we could possibly help each other until after she slashes my grasping hand...or, worse yet, simply ignores me.
Beneath me, the monsters with quicksilver reflexes and razor-sharp smiles await with unblinking eyes. The logos of my creditors are branded on their sides. Only predators smile, after all.
I gotta get out.
I can't stay here.
* * * * * * * * * *
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