Forget "Like A Man"...Just THINK!

People who know me will attest to this fact: Treating me like you think I’m stupid is one of the surest ways to get me to show you how wrong you are…usually in a manner that makes you look really simple. I used to tell my ex-girlfriend all the time, “Stop managing me.” I could tell when she was trying to use conflict resolution techniques to assuage me. Newp! Use your own brain! Even if the methodology of thought in which you engage me is one you learned, personalize it. The only textbook solution that will work on me is disengagement. In other words, go away!

Come to think of it, that’s the final conflict resolution technique that she used on me. I’m amused. Touché, pussycat!

---

It’s cold as a witch’s tit here today! Why the hell is it 50-some’n degrees in Atlanta, right now?

---

I watched Think Like A Man this weekend. It was ok: Happily ever after for Black girls, and whatnot. They’ll leave the theater feeling empowered. That’s important.

Meanwhile…in THIS galaxy…men with brains three feet above their pelvis remain disenchanted with the characterization in the movies.

There were too many characters in this movie. What did we really know about the women? Having a relationship with a woman without knowing what’s particularly squirrelly about her is usually a recipe for a lot of arguing. Experience and anecdotal evidence speak volumes on the subject. For instance, why did one of the characters sleep with men on first dates before she was so miraculously saved by this dating bible written by a stand-up comedian? Chris Brown’s himbo character could NOT have been SMARTER when he approached her initially. Think about it. So, what was it? Daddy issues? Was she molested as a young girl? Was she just horny all the time? Seems trivial, but each one of those issues has kept many a man up at night wondering what the hell was wrong with his woman? But, that was untouched.

That was just one issue in five. Youngest female COO in corporate history? What drove that? Naked ambition? Fear of failure?

Where was that li’l boy’s daddy?

The best-rounded man in that clique of doofuses was the married, white man. He was also the wimpiest. Dude dunked on him and he congratulated him. Testosterone replacement therapy is in order. Did it have to be portrayed that way? Newp! But, the perception in the dominant culture in American society is that a married man is a domesticated man. Minivans & helmets for the kids cuz that’s what she wants.

Regardless, the rest of those male characters were so one-dimensional and flawed that if they turned sideways, they’d disappear. Sistas SWEAR that that’s how men really are on their dating scene. “You have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince.” *shrug* I know there are a lot of stupid, venal, selfish men out there. There’s no sense in being defensive about that. Still, there are a lot of good men out here who are struggling to do the right thing in a society that continues to look down upon them and who passed on or who are viewed as 'undateable'.

Anyway…if you watch the movie and enjoy it for the sake of entertainment, who could find fault in that? But, if you take those scripted behaviors or the book that inspired this movie as some sort of behavioral guide, then you can probably return your brain to sender marked “UNUSED”.

Post-Racial - How Did We Get Here?

I was listening to Jon Connors “Saginaw Street Chronicles” off of his Season 2 mixtape. This was followed up by Big K.R.I.T.’s “Children of the World”. I couldn’t help but feel the despair of my little brothers. This “post-racial” world we live in is a trip. “Post-racial” apparently means insults, disparaging remarks and the continued systemic disenfranchisement of an entire ethnic group is ok as long as you show one of them in a beer commercial with the “majority”.


School systems steered little boys into positions where they could “make shit”. So, pipefitters, machinists, plumbers, painters, carpenters, mechanics, and other jobs of this sort were the jobs young men were encouraged to seek. Where I grew up, Detroit, working in “the plant” was the job a lot of dudes looked for. It was decent money. You could raise a family on it. And, industries in the area were not hiring young men from the city. Then, big corporations sent all those production jobs overseas and put the people in them out of work. Young men saw their fathers laid off and downsized after decades of doing what was expected of them.

Right around that time, the music industry corrupted & changed. In the 80s, when hip hop went public and became more than a fad, drugs were taboo and those who used them were shunned. Then, the industry gave a voice to drug users. Weed ("pot" to some of you, marijuana officially) is now viewed as the norm. Right around that same time in the 80s, crack hit the streets. The federal government’s tacit complacence, if not actual involvement, in the crack epidemic of the 1980s is a matter of public record.

A Zombie Apocalypse is some sort of cultural meme and a bit of a running joke for most people; but, I lived through Detroit in the 1980s. It was like Raccoon City up in that bitch at times.

So, “society” has steered generations of young men towards these jobs which were then taken away, stripping them of hope and livelihood. The popular music of the time shifted from themes of responsibility, camaraderie and fun to darker themes of materialism, violence and irresponsible sex. Language and music inform cultures. The worst drug epidemic this society has seen to date hits these same streets. So, you can make a LOT of money if you participate in the sale & distribution of these drugs, but to survive the most violent aspects of your personality MUST come to the fore. The other side of that coin is being a customer—using crack, looking for a high as good as that first hit. Anecdotally, some versions of crack were known as cumbomb. Your first high was so good, you’d orgasm. Seeking that elusive high is what created a rock/crack cocaine addict, also known as a “crackhead”.

The same society that stripped the people native to the continent they colonized of hope and their homes, shipping them/us (running joke or not, many Black Americans are the bastard children of two or more continents) to “reservations”, freely supplying them with a chemical addictive (alcohol in the case of Native Americans), used this tried & true methodology in inner cities in the 1980s & 90s.

The additional step of not only making possession of crack illegal, but making the penalty three times stiffer than possession of a corresponding weight of cocaine, made a further mess of things. Mandatory sentencing incarcerated thousands, then millions, of young, Black men. Incarceration became enculturation…along with the violence, misogyny, hopelessness and despair glorified in this newer form of hip hop. Language & music do as much to inform a culture as they are informed by it, after all. Then, the same "post-racial" society whose majority culture & systemic bigotry enabled this entire sad, sorry state of affairs, clucks its collective tongue, shakes its big, collective head and places all the blame squarely on the Black Man.

The hate affair that America has with the Black Man is deeper and even more insidious than what I’ve stated. As I wrote, the rabbit hole just kept getting deeper. Consider that conquerors have proven over the centuries that if you take the men out of the equation, if you can emasculate them either physically or psychologically, then you can do what you want with their women. Follow that thought to its natural end. I elected not to follow every branch of thought, however. There isn’t enough time.

Still, my brothas, you’re playing with a stacked deck. I salute each & every one of you who beat the odds and is trying to do the right thing despite the "post-racial" world around you. Keep your head up and be smart.

F'real, tho...

Paragraph upon paragraph, months later...

In the end, this why she mad:

...and, I wasn't even trying to play it like this.

If you know you're ultimately incompatible with someone, how long are YOU going to play pretend? Then, you tell them, without either being inconsiderate or mean, that this thing you have going on doesn't work for you. You tell them that you don't WANT them to change themselves. You just want/need to move forward.  That, after all, is the entire point of DATING. You're testing your compatibility with this person.

There was a period after the breakup where my sole concern was improving my life for my brats and for myself. I was completely unconcerned with dating. PS3 was all the entertainment I needed. It was during that time period that I ran into someone interesting. That is no slight on ANY of my exes.

So, please stop taking it like that. You know you couldn't deal with me or my bratz, anyway.

Tweet! Tweet! Rockin’ Robin!

I've done some acrobatically filthy things with eagerly willing participants. But…

*lost my thought*

---

Wassup, piglets.

---

I need a Mountain Dew. But, MD keeps weight on you like a diver's belt. So, my creativity must be internally fueled. I apologize in advance.

---

So, yeah…Twitter. Ever tried it? Tens of millions of people on it as you read this, but I know a few people who still think, "That's just a fad." Hell, my dad, who has sent me 800-character text messages, still thinks rap is a fad and hates my baggy jeans & boots. Meanwhile, my son rides a skateboard and dresses like a pre-1968 peace activist complete with "stovepipe" jeans, fedoras, and oxford shirts.

Anyway, I apologize for the digression. Back to Twitter. The more I interact with people on the basis of hip hop on this social medium, the more artists I find who are creating some great music without the backing or, more importantly, direction of profit-driven, commercial radio-focused major labels.

You've seen young Wiki, below. But, I've also found hard working, but relatively unknown, artists, groups and producers like Classified, Conrizzle, Clear Soul Forces, Droop E, Mike Mills, and Reallionaire Jream along with Hip Hop legends like Erick Sermon. I named these folks in particular because they have free music on the web…and, it's good music.

*shrug* I'm sure you'll do what you do. But, if you're open to suggestion, check Twitter out, you pseudo-Luddite. It might surprise you.

---

If a woman the same size as her partner picks a physical fight with him and he defends himself, is he an "abuser"? Women will say some crazy shit like, "She couldn't hurt him"...as if his skin is organic steel like Colossus. Or: He shouldn't have been with her in the first place. (Riiight. Cuz, prognostication & clairvoyance comes with the penis.) Or, my favorite: Men MAKE women act like they do. (I've heard that from a few women who didn't want to take responsibility for their OWN actions.)


Seen this yet? Rihanna Defiantly Refuses to End Contact with Chris Brown

There a reason why those two singers keep hanging out. Everyone condemned the dude, ignoring reports that their relationship was "volatile". "Volatile" is media for "She swings on folks". Now, look back at how that shook out. When she showed up w/black eyes, she wasn't talking. You ever got your ass beat after you started the fight? Your ass was quiet, weren't you? You knew you deserved that whuppin'.

Is domestic violence acceptable? No. But, I bet your mom's last paycheck that your reaction is different if a dude picks a fight w/his woman and she beats dat ass. You'd laugh. Everything in the reports about the night when she showed up looking like a speed bump said to me that she picked that fight...and lost. Now...look at yourself and compare how that agitates you. He was supposed to not defend himself, right?

The rule remains the same for women as it does for men: NO HITTING!!! Maybe they've grown up some and learned that lesson.

Meanwhile...you #GoSiddown

Objectivity & the Female Gender

I do objectify women. *shrug* I won't apologize for it. I'm genetically designed to appreciate female mammalian secondary sexual characteristics. For the uninformed those are those curves produced by the XX chromosome set that make babies & straight men want to nurse. (Ma-Ma!)


I mean, I see a stacked babe wearing something form-fitting or revealing and my brain automatically begins preparing Tab A or insertion into Tabs A-C. (Yeah, I know! I'm nasty!) This is merely idle speculation, mind you. My conscious mind doesn't even bother calculating the odds of success of each angle of approach any more.

Meh! Why bother?

But, my subconscious mind is still blubbering with a reaction that I hope to never successfully quell. My subconscious mind is slavering like chained hyena with blood somewhere close. ("Gottdamm!! She got a NICE ass!!!") Fortunately, my poker face is iron. There are women who I'd put a hickey on one of her asscheeks in the middle of the Rose Bowl parade. But, they'll never know it…and, neither will you…because I have restraint. Now, when I'm around friends that I trust, I might just admit that I find a woman attractive.

I say this because I realize that women live in constant fear of men and annoyance at men. Much of this reaction is because many men don't know how to compliment a woman and don't know how to approach a woman. Much of their reaction is because many women let fashion put all their goodies out where men can ogle them. There are no excuses in either case.

Fellas, even if everything about the woman makes you want to be Tarzan to her Jane, give it a rest. Unless she says, "Yes, I'll go home with you" or something equivalent, sitcho monkey ass down.

Women, know what you want, don't send mixed signals, and put on some damned clothes. Your behavior & clothing is never EVER an excuse for stalking, molestation or rape. But, some of these dudes just DON'T know how to behave.

Anyway…I gotta go.

Deuces

The Politics of Race & the Death of a Child

The more I deal with people, the less I want to. Some people cling to this shining hope that people can rise above their simian natures to attain something better as a species. *smh* That's…NOT…gonna happen. The internet, the very vehicle of communication on which you are reading this, gives all the proof you need or desire to see mankind's TRUE condition as venal, self-centered primates.

CASE IN POINT:

As you may see below, this is the time period after the death of Trayvon Martin, a 17 year old boy slain while returning from a snack run. George Zimmerman, an armed 28-year-old man, after being instructed to remain in his vehicle, stalked, confronted and killed this unarmed teenager with a gunshot. What I stated here is not disputed by anyone. However, justification for this young man's MURDER is offered based on the fact that Trayvon is a Black teenager while Zimmerman is of mixed racial descent, White & Latino. Caucasian Americans have offered statistics on "Black on Black" crime in rebuttal.

HOW IS THAT RELEVANT?

What you're saying is that I should not feel outrage at this young man's death because of something that happened to someone else? You're excusing the murder of a child because of…racial politics? People's propensity to play saints & sinners in response to a tragedy is sickening.

George Zimmerman's father is a retired District Court judge. And, while you can't PROVE something like coercion or use of influence by their absence, what man do you know of that can get into a physical dispute with a policeman and the case just goes away? Don't let Zimmerman's undoubtedly shrewd defense team trick you into thinking about this case in the terms of race. Once you do, then they can plant seeds of reasonable doubt. That's legalese for, "Maybe he didn't do it." Or, "Maybe Trayvon deserved to die."

The bottom line is this: Zimmerman is NOT a police officer. This was NOT an undercover operation. Young Mr. Martin was unarmed and did not confront Mr. Zimmerman in his vehicle. Finally, there's this: If George Zimmerman had remained in his car, had followed police instruction, had not stalked and confronted this man-child, he may not be alive today; BUT HE WOULD NOT HAVE DIED THAT NIGHT AT GEORGE ZIMMERMAN'S HAND. That, and only that, is the basis for judgment.

The politics of race OBVIOUSLY needs to still be addressed in America.^* 44 years after the death of America's most famous civil rights leader, digression in the mindset of the majority and in their children is horribly evident in the incendiary comments and posts left intentionally scattered throughout this very vehicle of communication on which you are reading this. But, leave it out of THIS case and judge just based on the evidence.

^* A heartfelt plea to the Crown Prosecution Service in the UK is here: http://blogs.independent.co.uk/2012/04/02/police-the-race-game-and-a-request-to-the-cps/
A father's lessons to his son are here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/24/trayvon-martin-my-son-and_1_n_1377003.html?ref=mostpopular
Be sure to read the comments & responses to both. They might be enlightening.

I did this bugged-out photo shoot with some of the Ladies at Toys on Chains -http://toysonchains.tumblr.com/

I did this bugged-out photo shoot with some of the Ladies at Toys on Chains -http://toysonchains.tumblr.com/: I did this bugged-out photo shoot with some of the Ladies at Toys on Chains -http://toysonchains.tumblr.com/

R.A. the Rugged Man, one of hip hop's more original acts.

Inappropriate Test Response

My pen is in a goat.

I've seen adult chatters online who 1) haven't advanced past this level and 2) actually WOULD put their penis in a goat. *dead*

Pretty Picture

Wiki - Pretty Picture from Letter Racer on Vimeo.

I'd much rather listen to some real HipHop than the (c)rap on the radio. Wiki has got a great start here.

Wiki Speaks...

Wikispeaks - Wiki 1993 from Letter Racer on Vimeo.
Another kid about the same age as my son. Note the hoodies...

Look at this kid.

Now...look at my kid:

Both 17. Both with little brothers. The one up top, though, is dead.

My heart goes out to his parents, family and friends. Their pain is nearly unimaginable to me. I know that I could not be as calm as they are during this time.

As part of the national discourse on Trayvon Martin's death, people are using "Black-on-White crime" statistics to defend the police chief & Trayvon's killer, Zimmerman. I'm not posting links or references because it sickens me. If you have any sort of objectivity combined with any knowledge of search engines, then all you need to do is search. You'll see what I'm talking about.

The bottom line is this: An unarmed child on a parent-sanctioned errand was stalked, attacked and slain by an armed adult who outweighed him by 100 lbs. and who, subsequently, lied about his actions. In what culture is this acceptable behavior. Melanin, genotype and phenotype have nothing to do with this CRIME. We can disagree on this. It IS a free country. But, stay away from me if you think behavior like that is in ANY way acceptable.

Black Ice

The Music Industry Exposed

Felonious Monk

Awesome Rant To The US Gov't

My Tweets, Retweeted

I guess these are my psy quotes—2011.

• I'm not a conspiracy theorist. People are too greedy, mean and stupid to get along for long when money is involved.—20 minutes ago
  
• @TrickyDMR @CalebTweetsToo The world shows nothing but contempt for us. But, mention it & some asshole will call it "the race card".—23 Sep
  
• Letting people turn #TroyDavis case into a platform for political agendas trivializes THIS man's fight for his life.—21 Sep
  
• You should know that police officers feel that their life is worth more than your own. Watch their tactics whenever this is questioned.—21 Sep
  
• Chick didn't say anything at first when she called. She said she was choked on a nut. #pause
  #NotMyFault—21 Sep
  
• With all the flossin' that I've seen these rappers do, I still ain't seen shit as cool as Special Ed's hovercraft. Another Vanquish? *yawn*—21 Sep
  
• I'm just glad #Twitter ain't always rearranging the furniture like #Facebook keeps doing. Facebook, you suck.—21 Sep
  
• "@RoaryDaMascot: "@SmittyDMR: Yo follow my cousin @TrickyDMR" No" LoL@this—20 Sep
  
• I had an amazing weekend. Those always make Mondays tougher to deal with.—19 Sep
  
• @kittygalore6 Good point. Why are we letting women out of the kitchen? And, who let you wear shoes?!? I must discuss this with other men.—15 Sep
  
• @DivinelyGeneva @Melly2times @Janae_Snow 5'2", 230# ... she can leave footprints in DRY concrete.—15 Sep
  
• @DetroitMansRoom #TeamDMR || Spartans ain't s'posed 2B shiny. But: better than Maryland. *smh* I blame Astroturf for these unis.—14 Sep
  
• Which is worse: Crazy people that don't know they're crazy or nutty fuckers that know JUST how nucking futs they really are?—14 Sep
  
• "Our slaves are hired for life and well compensated; there is no starvation, no begging, no want of employment" - John Henry Hammond—13 Sep
  
• 14 Kills/0 Deaths...Team Deathmatch—12 Sep
  
• The highest treason that a crab can make is to leap for the rim of the bucket. - Steven Pressfield, The War of Art—12 Sep
  
• @TrickyDMR Pawn that ring & run 'em. Don't even THINK about settling down w/one chick for AT LEAST two years.—9 Sep
  
• I wish they'd put some food coloring in that soap dispenser cuz I swear that shit looks like jizz.—8 Sep
  
• R Kelly is trending. Did somebody else's kid get peed on by the Pied Piper of Love? Just wondering...—6 Sep
  
• Half the time, upon examination, people deserve the person they're with just from sheer hardheadedness.—3 Sep
  
• Even before Chedda Boyz, we had AWOL. http://youtu.be/lLb8iQDn6jE
  #ItsADetroitThing—3 Sep
  
• Lean forward a li'l bit before you turn your head to see what's happening behind you so you don't get snuck. #ItsADetroitThing—3 Sep
  
• ...even when it looks like somebody's jiggling a basket full of fat puppies in front of you when she walks past.—2 Sep U
  
• Professional: adj. (pro fes' shun ul): Pretending like you have not noticed that she has a nice ass at work...—2 Sep
  
• #dadquotes Go in there and get my Bible. #canyoujustbeatme—31 Aug
  
• #ThingsHoodratsLove 3-5 syllable baby names involving apostrophes and the suffixes -ika, isha, and/or -arion—30 Aug
  
• "To sum it up, I'll Kill you! I don't blame you for being wack! I blame your fans for being dumb enough to feel you!" @Copywrite #truth—30 Aug
  
• Clumsy muhfukkaz keep falling offa shit in Texas Stadium. Just get League Pass & let your clumsy relatives watch from home. Sheesh!—29 Aug
  
• @JeanGreasy Still haven't figured out why so many clueless folks follow such a brilliant smartass. The old moth/flame theory, I guess.—23 Aug
  
• The #earthquake was a publicity stunt for the new #Rezurrection Zombie Pack for Call of Duty. Are you near a cemetery?—23 Aug
  
• @Torae the current standard of "rap" is autotune and dudes chanting simplistic phrases. So, yeah, dope beats and smooth flow IS old school.—23 Aug
  
• "@foxxhole: Should polygamy be legalized?" Having 2 wives is like having 2 migraines.—18 Aug
  
• Ain't but so many muhfukkaz who "got their shit together". Realistically, get w/somebody who needs a lil help or get used to being alone.—18 Aug
  
• #smh If you can't find a "decent man", then maybe your ass need to quit givin' your number out in the club.—18 Aug
  
• @Trickytweets2 I always enjoy a dancer who does some shit that I can only respond to with a golf clap.—18 Aug
  
• Some people's full potential was reached when their particular sperm was first to the egg. #AllDownhillFromThere—17 Aug
  
• #IWishTheyWouldBringBack real singers who can actually sing. I've had enough of "performing artists".—17 Aug
  
• The introduction of #autotune into any song automatically & immediately lowers the intellectual mean of the audience.—17 Aug
  
• @bia_kay A big enough ass swallows all pannies except bloomers. BUT, you won't see a panny line.—16 Aug
  
• #ManLaw Don't do anything during the courtship, engagement or wedding that you can't top on the first anniversary. #DMR—16 Aug
  
• #sexfacts Magnums WILL break. If it starts feeling too good, pull out & check.—16 Aug
  
• *hookin' my kids on Star Trek* #nerdgenesbreedtrue—15 Aug
  
• @JeanGreasy I'm still panicky about mad cow disease...but, I'm still craving a steak.—15 Aug
  
• #JobsDrakeHadBeforeBecomingARapper Survey says: Fluffer—15 Aug
  
• #shedidntcallbecause she wasn't done with her math homework. #shestooyoungforyoubro—12 Aug
  
• #youknowyouacrookwhen the cops call your first name out the window of their cop car without lookin' you up on their computer.—11 Aug
  
• If you get sick cuz you're swole, that's on you. But, if you swell up because you're sick, THEN you can ride the fatboy scooter @ Walmart.—10 Aug
  
• #scarymovierulestoliveby just as everyone breathes a sigh of relief that it's over, step to one side, duck & mind the splash of blood.—10 Aug
  
• Women's timeline/wall kill me w/this. Friday: All kinds of sexual innuendo. Saturday: Break up ('men are pigs' tweets) Sunday: Scriptures—29 Jul
  
• @detroitflipside On the whole, though: you're right! He should get more recognition than he does...even though he's a legend.—29 Jul
  
• @MissZindzi @AristaFbabi @DJZeeti You know, put some triangular blocks behind her so she doesn't roll back.—28 Jul
  
• #whitepeoplehobbies are sometimes useful. We wouldn't know how hot volcanoes get, how fast bears can run or have Nikes without them.—19 Jul
  
• #umightbeghetto if you have fake toenails. I won't mention them ashy heels and too-small mules.—24 Jun
  
• I'm craving two coney dogs, some @BetterMade chips and a cold, @myfaygo cola. But, I'm in Atlanta. :-(—22 Jun
  
• So, yeah! If you don't cop that #Elmatic, I might have to roll up to your crib and trip one of your kids. It's THAT good!—19 May
  
• So, you say you're a #Hiphop Head? Tune in to #wrekroomrenaissance
  http://streaming.wrek.org:8000/wrek_live-128kb @wrekroom—19 May
  
• The key to surviving the Zombie Apocalypse is having lots of fat, slow friends...unless you're the fat, slow friend. Nice knowing you, tubby—19 May
  
• #sometimesyouhaveto realize that just cuz somebody says or types "God" doesn't mean they know a thing about life, truth or the Bible.—19 May
  
• You keep blaming your sex partners' penis size rather than doing Kegels, Loosey. #thatswhyursingle—17 May
  
• Remember, boys: Better to buy her tampons voluntarily than diapers by court order. #thingsgirlswantboystodo—12 May
  
• I'm gonna help save beached whales while wearing a Pro-Choice t-shirt. #bucketlist—9 May
  
• @DetroitMansRoom Michigan made it to the Frozen Four. Give 'em props.—26 Mar
  
• @jasmith579 Faygo bought the recipe for the original Vernors. Ginger Ale > Ginger Soda (look @ the bottles). Try Faygo Sensations.—6 Jan
  
• @wrekroom Hip hop has sub-genres. Radio rap has its place. So does lyricism and hip hop's other classic elements.—10 Jun 10

Retweets by Me

One reason why I enjoy Twitter is the people who make me laugh. These are the things that I passed on to the folks who "follow" me.

18 Sep »    myfabolouslife :: Fabolous    

Jus ran into my nigga @RayJ at @iamdiddy dinner.. He told me & @KevinHart4real that it was a fucked up edit & bitches was there!!

19 Sep »    SeanMandela :: Mandela P!     

I wake up hearing fab vs. Ray J. ??? I'm going back to sleep Can't we all get along? #NP WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?

15 Sep »    MARLONLWAYANS :: marlon wayans    

What do u do about child obesity? Make them fat babies run http://say.ly/MiwIor

15 Sep »    IMWhatsRelevant :: Atrice Carey     

the uglier u are the better yo purse and shoes gotta look

15 Sep »    mclyte :: MC Lyte     

"When you choose your friends, don't be short-changed by choosing personality over character." -- W. Somerset Maugham #quotes

14 Sep »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Lmfao RT @jose3030 When people unfollow me on Twitter, I'm all like http://twitpic.com/6gohgu

14 Sep »    TalibKweli :: Talib Kweli Greene     

When u only have 140 characters, context is king. Practice visiting a timeline b4 u comment on 1 tweet u don't like. You'll thank me later!

14 Sep »    Tone_Gaines :: Tone Gaines     

so since Glen Rice slayed Sarah Palin can she now be on Basketball Wives U.S.?

14 Sep »    TalibKweli :: Talib Kweli Greene     

I talk to Mos abt getting on twitter he be like nah son. Im like so I gotta deal with the crazy ones by myself ok! lol

14 Sep »    shitmydadsays :: Justin     

"Bullshit. Don't pretend you don't care about your birthday. It's like watching a hooker pretend she's out for a walk when cops drive by."

13 Sep »    phontigallo :: Phonte     

This nigga should just get a timeshare. RT @DDotOmen Gucci Mane Charged For Assault, Sentenced To 6 Months: tinyurl.com/6yz48sa   

13 Sep »    WarrenWint :: Warren Wint     

W.I.N.T: Written In Native Tongue Hosted by DJ @JonneyMiles http://www.datpiff.com/Warren-Wint-WINT-Written-In-Native-Tongue-mixtape.246985.html   FREE DOWNLOAD!!!!

12 Sep »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

i really hate when ppl put me in facebook groups i didnt request to be in

9 Sep »    COPYWRITE :: פיטר W. Mirabella     

@REALDJPREMIER where can I get some beat prices fam? Salute. Long time fan over here #MHz

7 Sep »    cherrygarcia :: Ben & Jerry's     

Our newest limited batch flavor is an ode to a classic SNL skit. You won't be able to resist our Schweddy Balls! http://ow.ly/6odmc

7 Sep »    TFLN :: TextsFromLastNight     

(206): Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.

6 Sep »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

RT @YolieTheJew Sherri Sheherd's husband has child-bearing hips. <--- and she has man hips. So they match!

6 Sep »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

RT @KidFury Girl, go play with your hearing aid. RT @iRespectFemales: Midgets laugh when they run because the grass tickles their balls lol

6 Sep »    Kitkas :: Katrie Seen     

Don't call me #private I just won't pick up!!

5 Sep »    AlanTheChemist :: ALCHEMIST     

@ @SeanMandela "my words connected with the crowd". Fuckouttahere with that moist emo shit son. Real thugs don't connect with crowds B

4 Sep »    thecoreyholcomb :: Corey Holcomb     

2 ghetto hoes got in a fight just as Sade started singing "is it a crime". Da usher broke it up & said "how did u hoes get good seats?"

3 Sep »    MARLONLWAYANS :: marlon wayans     

Roy Jones jr annunciation is so bad My close caption just read "what the fuck did he just say"???

3 Sep »    MARLONLWAYANS :: marlon wayans     

Comedians need freedom to create. Audiences need to protect and respect that. Stop the witch hunts is ridiculous. We say dumb shit daily.

2 Sep »    imKaySoloBtc :: Kay Solo     

-- having other cities mad we're a trending topic #ItsADetroitThing

2 Sep »    argvee :: Heather Adkins     

All the adjectives in the world (e.g., unsophisticated) won't make you feel better about getting owned. Give them up.

2 Sep »    CornelWest :: Cornel West     

Tune into @TavisSmiley's primetime @PBS special about the (mis)education of #Blackboys Tues, Sept. 13 #TooImportantToFail http://ow.ly/6kkhb

2 Sep »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Niggas be like "FUCK freedom. That freedom shit is #FTF ! If u like freedom, you a ho!"

2 Sep »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Umm. If u think TI and his affection for the prison industrial complex is a black issue, unfollow me then kill yourself now. Thanks.

31 Aug »    SeanMandela :: Mandela P!     

Banging beat + talk of latest ride + weirdo outfit+ reference of model = most of the raps I hear

31 Aug »    bia_kay :: k     

The truth hurts..some people can not accept it and continue to search for an answer that pleases them...pleasing answer=fake assery

30 Aug »    RussianRedKiss :: TeeNicole     

#ThingsHoodRatsLove Drake

30 Aug »    blackbarbie334 :: Aisha Smith     

#ThingsHoodratsLove naming their child something they cant spell until the 11th grade

29 Aug »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

lil wayne pretty handsome guy AYE? RT @mintee69: @PageKennedy-Behold! http://twitpic.com/6daxgk

28 Aug »    DJYABOYEARL :: Chicken & Watermelon     

@DJYABOYEARL: Hoes dont like to be hoes so just call um "bae" like this "u coming over bae?" Sounds better then "u coming over hoe?"

28 Aug »    AlanTheChemist :: ALCHEMIST     

I wonder which one of u bitch ass rappers is gonna be the 1st to rock a monocle.

28 Aug »    pharoahemonch :: Pharoahe Monch     

makin veterans run for medicine cause in a fight i put out more lights than con edison - Kool G Rap <- #insane

26 Aug »    MikeTyson :: Mike Tyson     

You may win the rat race but you're still a rat.

26 Aug »    9thWonderMusic :: 9th Wonder     

Sad to say....can't listen to everybody's music....#reallifetweet

25 Aug »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

if ur basically naked in all ur twitt pics & avatars in a compromising position & u still have less than 500 followers ITS NOT WORKING UGLY

25 Aug »    TFLN :: TextsFromLastNight     

(210): If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.

24 Aug »    someecards :: someecards     

I am no match for the perfect, carefully crafted online version of myself. http://some.ly/niXVkW

23 Aug »    JonC607 :: Jon Coughlin     

I hate that one person on facebook that adds all of ur friends that they don't even know.

19 Aug »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Neutralize the ugly broad RT @Statquo: Ths nigga @SperryPark_CEO is the worst wing man evr he gotta learn the phrase "take one for the team"

18 Aug »    9thWonderMusic :: 9th Wonder     

Hip Hop was made to create the cool, we never follow what's supposed to be cool..

18 Aug »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

some niggas are just unfuckable @frikitonafriki

18 Aug »    SeanMandela :: Mandela P!     

If u have no facial hair guess what.... You are a girl!!!! #thatisall

18 Aug »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Only u Baz RT @crazydjbazarro: A midget just walked passed me and said "yo u a sucker"..

18 Aug »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#IHate tagged photos, videos n being added to peoples groups on Facebook. I don't care about your groups and don't tag me in sh*t I'm not in

18 Aug »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#IHate seeing strippers with c sections. This is a no c section strip club lady.

17 Aug »    TonyTRoberts :: Tony Roberts     

NYAB: Road Rage Shout Out..."Burn your car bitch and get a horse and buggy!"...."Where the "F" are your Grandkids, let them drive!"

17 Aug »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

How I gauge situations by the way my name is said to me: "Jeeeean. *sigh*" = What did I do? "Jeannie"= YAY! or REALLY SAD.

17 Aug »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

I hate having to wear clothes sometimes

17 Aug »    MeLaMachinko :: Mela Tequila     

Why is it so hard to throw away random chargers even when u have NO idea what they charged?

17 Aug »    9thWonderMusic :: 9th Wonder     

Big ups to the parents who STILL BELIEVE IN LAYAWAY...the science of LIFE!......#Parenthood

17 Aug »    therealrahdigga :: Rah Digga     

Sooo my nephew just got "jumped" n2 a gang...ok...now he bout to get his ass whooped by me right back out of it...

17 Aug »    9thWonderMusic :: 9th Wonder     

Young brothers, please remember, if u choose bucking as an action, be well advised of the considerable amounts of nucking that should follow

16 Aug »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

RT @WhoIsMissHawaii: RT @whiteboytatted: I love titties

16 Aug »    SeanMandela :: Mandela P!     

Like "what u in for?" murder..... "What u in for?" Tax Evasion Oh word ..... Bend over lol!

16 Aug »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#OnceYouGetMarriedYouCant leave the toilet seat up or you will get cussed out at 3am when she fell in.

15 Aug »    common :: COMMON     

LOL!! RT @robertglasper: They should do a deodorant check at the airport as well,its a crime to be funky on a long ass flight lol

11 Aug »    phontigallo :: Phonte     

#FamousLies "I have read and agree to the terms and conditions."

11 Aug »    SeanMandela :: Mandela P!     

Judge mathis is wild "uh huh I'm from the hood u can't fool me I know a crack head when I see one 1st of all ya too figgety" lmao!!!!

10 Aug »    TFLN :: TextsFromLastNight     

(713): His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.

10 Aug »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

I respect the artistry of watch the throne with @S_C_ & @kanyewest but lyrically they r not in same league as @Royceda59 & @Eminem Bad&evil

8 Aug »    WilliamsJon :: Jon Williams     

Amazing Times front page photo - woman leaps from burning building in #London. http://thetim.es/9RXx2p http://twitpic.com/6385k5

6 Aug »    phontigallo :: Phonte     

This. RT @SpiritEquality Music history doesn't change with age. You shouldn't think Ne-Yo is more influential than Stevie because you're 19.

3 Aug »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

If u have to keep pulling on ur top U R 2 FAT FOR THAT SIZE!!!!!

1 Aug »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#arentyoutiredof these chicks with that fattest juiciest asses but have the Mookie Blaylock face.

29 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#amomentofsilence for all the babies that missed the cut bcuz they landed on backs, sheets, foreheads, tits, stomachs, asses and swallowed

28 Jul »    Daddy_Jose :: - - - - - - -✈     

Notice in that rated 'G' movie Pinocchio they be using a gun. kids smoking and drinking. WTF ! #smfh

27 Jul »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

"@Section8Barbie: Chicks be acting all innocent and confused like they don't secretly want to be slutted out"

27 Jul »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

"@_MainAtractiOn: a relationship consist of two people..but bitches these days cant count"

26 Jul »    SmittyDMR :: Jason Smitty     

@TheRealVegaDoll: Guys only want you for sex. If u cant give sex u get left on the couch." unless we're watching the game on it. 

25 Jul »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

Some stuff should remain secret and not exposed on twitter

22 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

ever noticed when u 1st start talkin 2her she comes over with make up&goin out outfits but once she "has" u she comes over in her workout 1s

21 Jul »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

Ladies, easy on the makeup. It's too hot. I've seen 3 women walk in here looking like abused clowns. #nobeatintheheat

21 Jul »    TFLN :: TextsFromLastNight     

(+44): he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!

19 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

I bet Mexican kids fuck rick ross up with sticks when they see him trying to get all those chocolate bars 2spill out.

19 Jul »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

LMAO!!!! RT @parksmusic @JeanGreasy is definitely the biggest asshole in twitter history. In a good way of course.

19 Jul »    therealrahdigga :: Rah Digga     

I get a kick outta folks w/ their "all female rapper" bright ideas and shit...they be serious as hell too yall...

19 Jul »    someecards :: someecards     

The 11 most inappropriate CAPTCHA word combinations of all time. http://funni.ly/p2sH3g

18 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

ladies ladies ladies. plz if your going to fight on twitter do it naked. whos ass is bigger? @candySUPATHROAT @iamjennashea

18 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     #lifewaseasybefore

I discovered that lotion felt so good on my penis. All I was doing was making it soft n than was like hey whats this?

15 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

#IfTheBachelorWasBlack he would be from the Wayne Brady tribe of black dudes. #SafeNegro

14 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#yeahyoulosing if ur a big chic with tights on. They r a privilege not a rite bcuz they dont look rite on u. U look like a stuffedlaundrybag

13 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

You're not like those other chicks? #yeahright you're exactly like them cuz you felt the need to tell me you aren't.

12 Jul »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

The Internet is the inspiration for the most obnoxious, entitled, flagrant shit. It's really quite fascinating.

12 Jul »    chuckcreekmur :: Chuck Creekmur     

"The worst thing to call somebody is crazy-it's dismissive,'I don't understand this person,so they're crazy'-that's bullsht."-Dave Chappelle

11 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

check out the Closer tonight 9pm on TNT @pagekennedy will be on it

8 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

8 ball and MJG on stage looking like the #10. He should be called bowling ball

8 Jul »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

2    Special Olympics ad just came on. I don't know this person well yet, so I left the room before I acted like a total douche

8 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

RT @MrMarchand: #Ithink big girls need to know that we're all aware that the overhead Avi pic slenders you

7 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

my computer moving slower than Rick Ross metabolism

4 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

i wish i could call room service for vagina.then when im done set her outside my door like the food tray or like the flintstones do Dino

4 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

So no texting and driving but watching porn on multiple flat screens in a cutlass on 26"rims is fine. Ok got it

4 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

i been sleeping with a lot of black girls lately trying to unracist my peen monster. needless2say it hasnt worked yet but ima keep trying

3 Jul »    TonyTRoberts :: Tony Roberts     

NYAB: I respect all my black moms...but hot sauce is not a vegetable...it can't go with everything

3 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#relationshipsendbecause I saw your momma's ass n credit score. Plus she's more my age and this is her house not yours.

3 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

A FYI for women that shave off their entire eyebrows and draw on new ones I just wanna let you know you look like a clown and crazy.

4 Jul »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#fatpeoplenightmares them smelling something thinking someone is cooking to realize its just their thighs rubbing together.

4 Jul »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

#fatpeoplenightmares an app for a pan down function to their neck up photos

1 Jul »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

Being in a Hoveround doesn't make you "THE KING OF THE SIDEWALKS!!!" Stop trying to run me over! Asshole cripple!!!

30 Jun »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

Shout out to Amber Rose this chick is bald n killing the game. U chicks running around buying lacefronts, yaki, wigs, n still look like shit

30 Jun »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

Fat people don't listen to what people say about you. Don't get down on yourself. Keep your chins up.

28 Jun »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#reason2haveguybestfriend you women are so dumb with this. 90% or greater your male best friend wants to fock you and will if you let him

28 Jun »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

RT @uturnweeds: Girls with big perfect tits should feel superior over other bitches

26 Jun »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

Alll Rick Ross songs sound the same. Listening to his CD sound like a 45min song.

26 Jun »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

I don't have to shit on anyone else to be dope. I'm dope whether you exist or not.

24 Jun »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

u cant eat no carbs no sugar nada white but girls RT @JasmineReal: @PageKennedy what's the PK diet?

24 Jun »    PageKennedy :: Page Kennedy     

she should get her boyfriend a GPS 4Xmas. to find her vagina in all those mountains RT @FingerStinger: http://yfrog.com/gzavvbgj

24 Jun »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

"@lilduval: Rappers falling off NFL lockout NBA bout have a lock out too. shiiiiiit I'm getting sexier and sexier to u hoes ain't I?"

22 Jun »    someecards :: someecards     

I'd be much more into the Gay Pride Parade if real lesbians were like porn lesbians. http://some.ly/bGVtTC

18 Jun »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

I put a black rubber on last night. D+ck looked humongous. Was messed up though cuz my balls were still white. Looked like a penguin.

18 Jun »    RayLipowski :: Ray Lipowski     

#howtopleaseahoodrat when she asks you how to spell an easy word tell her you dont know either so you don't seem superior to her.

26 May »    someecards :: someecards     

It's not premarital sex if you never get married. http://some.ly/ikVeMJ

24 May »    Notasulga4Ever :: Chico Canady     

"No woman likes her man to have a good time when she's not around. Not one." -@KevinHart4real #KevinHartQuotes

20 May »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

You're kidding me. HONORED. *bows* Love you, Monie. Thank YOU. "@DaRealMonieLove: @JeanGreasy <<<<My Hero!"

20 May »    iRespectTamales :: tamale lover     

I'm gonna open a place called PIEKEA, you walk around & look at all kinds of pies, but when you wanna buy one you get a box of ingredients

19 May »    JHoolligan :: John Crosby     

@JeanGreasy Major rule don't b a douche & hide that u got bit ur not gettin cured. If some1 is suddenly pale or clammy they get the headshot

19 May »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

In the event we run out of money, you may pay me in ammo RT @akamami what do we pay with? re: #Cookies #Cake

12 May »    DivinelyGeneva :: G.Geneva     

"@SheSeauxSaditty: See that's the problem...you bitches be miserable in these tweets because ya'll don't have a dick to spin on regularly!"

12 May »    someecards :: someecards     

"NEWS"! Someecards.com has somehow grown to over 6 million monthly visits. We thank every disturbed individual who had nothing better to do.

12 May »    SmittyDMR :: Jason Smitty     

Nap time is underrated. I'm jealous of kids. RT @mssarahrich: I need a nap!

5 May »    someecards :: someecards     

I'm not above using obscure Mexican battles to justify my drinking. http://some.ly/aa3KII 

29 Apr »    RealComedyKing :: Comedy King ︻╦╤─     

Ladies, please post a picture with you in Boy shorts. It's #BoyshortsAppreciationDay :) R-T if you like girls in boy shorts.

14 Apr »    someecards :: someecards     

I love you like a pig loves not being bacon. http://some.ly/hD5EvJ

27 Mar »    WhyUSoBitchy :: .....     

Females that are in relationship need to stop listening to single females for advice go to other females that are in a relationship

22 Mar »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

Demand wht u want @ the forefront of music, or be an asshat & keep complaining tht the artists u like don't get more SHINE

16 Mar »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

Just paid $25 to check my luggage. This motherfucker just got on the plane with a cello. A CELLO.

6 Mar »    JeanGreasy :: JeanGrae     

#Schwinning http://twitpic.com/4707ee

Likability, by Guy Kawasaki

Assholic Reflections

I crack me up.

You know, if you can discover a product, service or system that appeals to stupid people, you can make yourself RICH. There are a LOT of stupid people in this world.

Look at your television. 45-65% of the shows on your screen would NOT be there if there were no stupid people to watch them. This is a market-driven economy. If there is no market for something, it goes away. Look in the back of your closet for proofs of this theorem. Man vs. Food? Really? EVERY reality show? Don't weasel now because YOU like a stupid TV show.

Even MMA, which I like, is ultimately some dumb shit. Two dudes step into a cage, do some antisocial, felonious tomfoolery to each other and then they're supposed to speak intelligibly to a camera while standing there dripping sweat and blood on the mat and discuss who they'd like to savage next. The guy who just got his ass kicked is supposed to stand up (or, wake up) and analyze just why he got his ass kicked and then shake the hand of the guy who just stomped him out. Yeah…dumb. But, at least I recognize it.

Anyway….

Orange hair

Sistas, you can (are going to) do what you want with your hair. We already know this. So, let's keep the eye rolling to a minimum, if we can. Still, we need to talk. Orange hair…really?!? You realize that you're not doing that to please your man, right? That is purely a personal decision on YOUR part. No brotha's ideal woman has orange hair unless he's an anime fan and has never had real boobs pressed on his face intentionally. If he had any input into your decision to dye your hair orange it was probably during an exchange like this:

YOU:    I'm going to dye my hair.

HIM:    *looking at TV* OK…

So, let's be real. While y'all are clownin' weaves and wigs, you REALLY need to be lookin' at your orange-assed head and tellin' yourself to stop it.

FOOTNOTE: Blonde ain't for everybody EITHER.

This has been a public service announcement sponsored by the We Try Foundation (WTF).

Morning dumps

I'm still not understanding what moves a dude to leave home, drive all the way to work, and THEN take a dump. Can you please stop that? Pinch that off at home. Spare me the uncomfortable moments of taking shallow sips of breath in a vain attempt to avoid inhaling your effluvia. And, yeah, I know that's a "natural bodily function", but you emerging from the stall, initiating eye contact and cheerfully greeting me? Especially on those occasions when you don't even bother to LOOK at the sink, let alone wash your soiled mitts? Uh…no. That's socially unacceptable. Go home and try again tomorrow.

Back pain

My back is twinging. My dad could probably tell me whether this is my sciatic nerve or some other shit. But…Ion't really even care. Just make the hurting stop.

My daughter used to walk on my back when she was little. She would giggle and dig her li'l toes in while trying to balance on my back. It was perfect. She's 5'8" and 160 lbs. of muscle now. She'd put me in a wheelchair even if she WASN'T in a bad mood, if she walked on my back, now.

So, I tried getting a li'l, Asian babe to be my girlfriend. She could've walked on my back for me. It would've been a symbiotic relationship of mutual appreciation, shared cultures and, of course, libidinous pursuits illegal in some sovereignties. After she walked on my back, she could sit on my front. Of course, like most of my 2011 endeavors, THAT turned to shit. *psy*

So, now what? Now, I'm masking my limp with my signatory pimp walk. çLMDBAO@that

It'll get better soon. I'm cautiously optimistic about that and a few OTHER things in my life, right now. I wish I had something to sip to the hope that I didn't just jinx myself by putting this down where psyqyq's nemesis can take note of it. That's a muted reference to past entries for the uninitiated. Ask, if you're so inclined.

Anyway…later.

$840.00

Just read the "offense" and if you've done it, you owe that fine. Keep going until you've read each "offense" and added up your total fine. When you are done, you don't have to confess your answers, just the amount of your fine.

Smoked pot $ 10.00
Did acid $ 5.00
Ever had sex at church $ 25.00
Woke up in the morning and did not know the person who was next to you $ 40.00
Had sex with someone on MySpace $ 25.00
Had sex for money $ 100.00
Ever had sex with the a different race $ 20.00
Vandalized something $ 20.00
Had sex on your parents' bed $ 10.00
Beat up someone $ 20.00
Been jumped $ 10.00
Crossed dressed $ 10.00
Given money to stripper $ 25.00
Been in love with a stripper $ 20.00
Kissed some one who's name you didn't know $ 0.10
Hit on some one of the same sex while at work $ 15.00
Ever drive drunk $ 20.00
Ever got drunk at work, or went to work while still drunk $ 50.00
Used toys while having sex $ 30.00
Got drunk, passed out and don't remember the night before $ 20.00
Went skinny dipping $ 5.00
Had sex in a pool $ 20.00
Kissed someone of the same sex $ 10.00
Had sex with someone of the same sex $ 20.00
Cheated on your significant other $ 10.00
Masturbated $ 10.00
Cheated on your significant other with their relative or close friend $ 20.00
Done oral $ 5.00
Got oral $ 5.00
Done / got oral in a car while it was moving $ 25.00
Stole something $ 10.00
Had sex with someone in jail $ 25.00
Made a nasty home video $ 15.00
Had a threesome $ 50.00
Had sex in the wild $ 20.00
Been in the same room while someone was having sex $ 25.00
Stole something worth over more than a hundred dollars $ 20.00
Had sex with someone 10 years older $ 20.00
Had sex with someone under 21 and you are over 27 $ 25.00
Been in love with two people or more at the same time $ 50.00
Said you love someone but didn't mean it $ 25.00
Went streaking $ 5.00
Went streaking in broad daylight $ 15.00
Been arrested $ 5.00
Spent time in jail $ 15.00
Peed in the pool $ 0.50
Played spin the bottle $ 5.00
Done something you regret $ 20.00
Had sex with your best friend $ 20.00
Had sex with someone you work with at work $ 25.00
Had anal sex $ 80.00
Lied to your mate $ 5.00
Lied to your mate about the sex being good $ 25.00

They Say That Only A Dog Wants a Bone (NSFW*)

Me&John's Tell Me posted byGregory Johnston on Vimeo.

Rowf, muthafukkah! Rowf!

* NSFW means 'not safe for work'. Now, erase the history before your IT Department puts a hit out on you.

...so I can die easy!

I've been watching Trigun with my son. Now, because of the theme song, I have the impulse to listen to Led Zeppelin's In My Time of Dying.

---

I live in one of the most ignorant states in what is increasing ignorant population. I'm generally appalled by the attitude of stupid people who actively resist getting any more intelligent. *smh* I mean, "Damn!" These idiots booed Carlos Santana. I mean, "Wow!" That's like booing Jimi Hendrix or Eric Clapton. Just how ignorant do you have to be to do that?

"If people want the immigration law to keep passing in every state then everybody should get out and just leave the American Indians here. This is about civil rights." Carlos Santana, 05/15/2011

This is Amurr'ka!

---

Y'know, every month there are two or three stories about paraplegics who can now walk again. Do you agree with that? Walking is a milestone in human existence. So, what is the first thing that society does to those accused of a crime? Confine them so they can't walk very far without an escort. Monkeyshines!

Anyway! More later…maybe.